Addressing the Weekly Topic “Disappointments in Life” the Detroit Youth Speak Out!


An elder once told me that trust must be gained in order for youngsters to truly open up.  This individual was exactly right.  Last Wednesday at the Detroit Impact center, the group and I tackled the one topic that no one in life will ever be able to avoid.  The “Big D” people.  Unfortunately, disappointments in life will hit us all at one time or another.  

Last weeks session in particular took many turns.  The  first  issue  addressed was coping with a  girl or boyfriend who no longer wanted to be in a relationship.  Next, we discussed the difficult task of removing the wrong kind of  friends and love ones  from your personal space. 

At first the energy of this session was somewhat hilarious.  Both young males and females provided several  funny suggestions on how  to deal with getting dumped.  The funniest response of them all was made  by one of the young ladies  in the group.  Her response was the following, “If a guy dumps you on a Friday, make sure you have a new one to walk down the school hall with by Monday.”  

Some of the responses in regards to removing the wrong individuals out of your personal space were more on the serious side.  For example, choosing to stop seeing a young lady because they drank alcohol or smoked marijuana.  Perhaps dealing with your boyfriend getting another young lady pregnant while he’s dating you.  All of the young ladies stated that they would leave a young man alone for making such a poor choice.  Most of the  males stated that they would not respect a young lady that drinks and smokes and would definitely stop seeing her despite of her beauty. 

The bottom line and the one thing  we all agreed to was that making the choice to move the wrong kind of people out of our spaces is not always the easiest thing to do however it pays off in the long run.





13 Responses to “Addressing the Weekly Topic “Disappointments in Life” the Detroit Youth Speak Out!”

  1. Micki Peluso Says:

    Excellent post, Adraly.

    Without communication nothing can be accomplished and there seems to be a lot of it here,

  2. Adra Young/Ardannyl Says:

    Thanks Micki. I will share keep you posted on the forth coming topics with my group at the Detriot Impact Center.

  3. Sandra McLeod Humphrey Says:

    Great post, Adra! Something I’ve noticed over the years is that our youth are more comfortable now speaking out and sharing their feelings. It must feel so good to be making a difference!

  4. Adra Young/Ardannyl Says:

    Wild Sandra thanks. I hope I am making a difference. I’m just trying to do my part. Together as mentor and youngsters we are both growing and becoming more comfortable.

  5. deirdret Says:

    Good morning, Adra! Good post! But just because someone smokes or drinks doesn’t make them a pariah to society. Who of us has not been there? What is causing this behavior? Many a Christian testamony came because someone cared enough to help them see salvation and they then changed their ways with the help of the Holy Spirit. I do agree that dependent on the situation certain things must be done. I’m not saying to stay with those that will bring you down. At any age we need to ask God for discernment and be smart enough to listen to that voice that says, “leave now!” Again, thanks for the post, it did a good job of making me think this morning! Have a blessed day!

    • Adra Young/Ardannyl Says:

      Deirdre, thanks for your response. I run a judgement free session weekly. We are not pointing the finger at any teen or young adult that drinks, or smokes. We all know especially in the 21st century that our youth today will try and do things they may not want to do just to simply be accepted by their peers. It’s really hard for youngsters to say no to the wrong things out here in the world when wrong is constanlty glorified. I commend the youth that have the courage to step away and say, “No…I’m okay with me.” I also commend today’s youth who have the courage to admit to the fatt that they do drink or smoke. When youngsters admit this to adults, it’s usually their way of screaming out for help. And when they scream out, it’s our job to get the help they need.

  6. Delinda McCann (@CalicoGardens) Says:

    Thanks for sharing. Raising children really does take a village. Kids just don’t talk comfortably with parents about the issues of dating or their friends’s drug usage. Hang in there girl. I love the type of work you are doing.

    • Adra Young/Ardannyl Says:

      Thank you Delinda. It’s funny you would say that. Now that I think about it, when I was a young adult, I never talked to my mom about teen issues and concerns. For some reason, I would always talk to one of my aunts. Thanks for your words of encouragement. I appreciate it.

  7. catnipoflife Says:

    Adra, great post! Most of my educational career was working with young people. My best years were those with the at-risk, drop-out prevention program (9th graders). It goes without saying that their peer relationships were heart-rending sometimes, and these on top of their already challenging curriculum. Conversation is the name of the game – keep those discussions going!

    • Adra Young/Ardannyl Says:

      Catnipoflife, thank you for your response. I have said for years, our youth need two things. They need to be heard and validated. I couldnt’agree with you more. Conversation is the key. Enjoy the rest of your day.

  8. linneann Says:

    Great discussions!

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