Archive for July, 2010

Today’s Youth And How They Deal With Grief And Unfortunate Events

July 29, 2010

Hello everyone!  This was week three with my young adult group here today in Detroit, Michigan. Our social dynamic or topic of  dialogue for the week was based upon grief and unfortunate events.   I provided each youngster a  self -analysis sheet with ten statements on how to deal with grief and unfortunate events.  The directions were to partner up with someone in the class and take turns asking one another how they felt about the 10 statements. They were instructed to  place either a capital A for appropriate or capital I for inappropriate next to the statements.

Shortly afterwards, I asked  the group to take the same list and to conduct a self-analysis on theirselves.  Sadly, most of  the youngsters in my group had experienced some type of unfortunate event of some kind.  In-fact, one of my young ladies had lost her mom by the age of 12, and one of my young men had lost his brother at  a rather young age as well.

  After the self-analysis was completed, we conducted a “Round Robin.”  The purpose of this was see how many young men and women felt or believed that crying was an appropriate or inappropriate way to  heal from either losing a loved one or getting pass an unfortunate event.  My young ladies stated that it was appropriate for them to cry.  They even mentioned that it was appropriate for adults to cry however, the majority of them believed that it was inappropriate for young men to cry.  For some reason, I predicted that the young men results would be the same.  Guess what?  They were.   

The majority of my young men stated that crying was inappropriate and they prefered to deal with unfortunate events in other ways. Some mentioned that they just simply preferred to distance themselves from people until they felt better. Other’s mentioned methods that I refuse to respond on due to confidentiality issues.

Knowing that most men from the time they are boys are taught to never cry or show signs of emotion, I explained to them that I understood their reasons in regards to the responses they provided.  However, the teacher in me explained to them that crying is an emotion provided by God and that  our tears represent the release of situations which result to us healing.   After explaining that,  maybe one or two of the young men understood or agreed with my view-point. The majority did not agree at all.   

I however was okay with their opinions.   Afterall, it’s not their fault  society as a whole have young men thinking that crying indicates the sign of  a weakness.    Next’s week’s topic of discussion deals with happy moments.  I will keep you posted on the outcome.

How Today’s Youth Handles Dealing With Overwhelming Secrets.

July 23, 2010

This week my young adults in my socialization skills class and I had the opportunity to dialogue on how to handle overwhelming secrets.  It was discovered that many of them had to hold on to something very painful vowing to never reveal it.  Reasoning had to deal with either letting a person down that they cared about or simply feeling that someone would retaliate due to them revealing it.  In other words, some of our youth take the statement” Snitches get Stitches” very close to heart.

By the end of the this weeks session, we had the opportunity to discuss safer ways to reveal overwhelming situations.  Despite of the fact that we did not agree on everything we discussed, we all came to one conclusion.  Overwhelming secrets will continue to hunt you until you decide to set them free.

Next week’s social dynamic of discussion is dealing with grief.  I look forward to sharing with you how this session goes.  Until then remember that touching the life of  youngster is simply your investment in the future.

Adra Young

Author of:  The Everyday Living of Children & Teens Monologues Series & Young Adult Socialization Skills Provider.

Learning From Today’s Youth

July 17, 2010

Honored with the opportunity to mentor of group of young adults at the Detroit Impact Center, I had no idea how much they would teach me.  This week I along with a group of very intellectual males and females had the opportunity to discuss abandonment issues. People you would be surprised to know how much courage and strength our youth posses today. 

As I taught the class, I had come to find out that the majority of my group had endured  or had encountered some sort of abandonment issue.  Yet, they refused to let it defeat them.   Everyone came in smiling and willing to give me a chance to teach them.  We had a ball.  And to tell you the truth, I can’t wait to next week.

Did I also fail to mention that the young adult males took just as much interest in my books as the young ladies!  I left last Wednesday feeling so good about what I was doing.  Next week, were going to address dealing with inappropriate secrets.  I’ll be sure to let you know how it goes.

Adra Young

Author of: The Everyday Living of Children & Teens Monologues Series